That Bit Your Ass
“Hair of the Dog.” It’s one of those folksy phrases that seem wise, like an old wives’ tale or the imbecilic ravings of a veterinarian who’s gotten into the phenobarbital. What does it mean? Where does it come from? And will it help us on New Year’s Day?
To decode this kind of semantic enigma, we need look no further than a Guardian UK page last modified in February of 2014, where “Nick” from Dublin posted, “It was originally thought that if a dog bit you, the best cure was to get a hair from the dog and pull it through the bite wound and you’d be right as rain in no time. Although who would dream of: a) going after the dog that bit you or b) trying to detach one of its hairs!” To which, I’ll add C) Dog germs! Get hot water! Get some disinfectant! Get some iodine!
The notion that “like cures like” can be traced back to antiquity and just about any culture that learned to ferment. But the prize goes to the ruthlessly efficient German idiom “Konterbier,” which literally translates to “counter beer” — the one you imbibe to counteract the ones that caused your hangover in the first place. Brilliant!
It’s like a reverse inoculation. You’ve been exposed to a toxin, so here’s a little more toxin to…finish the job…? As anyone who’s been hungover can tell you, the only real hangover cure is death. However, there are palliative measures one can take. Here’s my favorite hangover cure:
Cuddle up on your couch with an electrolyte beverage and stream our film, Werewolf Serenade, on Amazon.
Ha! See what I did there? But it’s true. Check it out:
Canines, check. Consequences of alcohol, check. Satisfying redemptive arc, check.
You will feel better. I will feel better. Hell, Jeff Bezos might even feel better. We all win.
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